I wanted take part in your fun and games but Corey Sellers clearly is unwilling to play nicely with strangers. But still, I at least wanted to try. Fueled by some irrational sense of ostracism, I decided to send a package as best I could with little hope of it actually making it to its intended recipient. This morning I brought a pre-loaded SFR to the post office and addressed it to:
Some Azzhat
Who Wont Share is Address with Me
Likely a Southerner, USA
Well, let me tell you, that did not go over well at all. They picked up the package and heard the ticking and stuff got pretty serious for a second.
USPS Guy: "Son, are you a f****** terrorist?"
Me: "No, sir. This is nothing like that. I was on this c-bid . . . "
USPS Guy (cutting me off): "Cbid? Damnit! Are you trying to send a bomb to Corey Sellers, this s*** happens all of the time, here is his address."
Me: "Wait, what? Really?"
USPS Guy: "Yeah, do me a favor and tell him to stop being so damn tight lipped with his addy!"
Me: "Will do, thank you kindly for your help."
Corey, solely to fulfill my commitment to USPS Guy, would you mind being a little less tight-lipped with your address. It seems that the US Postal Service knows who you are and that any future attempts to obfuscate your address will be in vain.
Tracking Number: 9505 5000 2280 6259 0000 04
Please send all return fire to Corey Sellers, sounds like he needs it more than me.