A pessimist sees a dark tunnel. An optimist sees the light at the end of the tunnel. A realist sees a freight train.

The train driver wonders why 3 morons are standing on the tracks.

I changed the color and font and it didn't change. What's the secret?

TEST
Lol. I tried putting it before, after, and both

It works like this

[ b][color = green] It works like this[ /color][/ b]
spaces above were put in there intentionally so you see how it's coded, the [color = green] starts the green color and the [/ color] stops the color. the [ b] starts bold and [/ b] ends it. The same form is similar when changing the font size, italics, underline or highlight and so on.

Yours looks like this
[color= darkblue][/ color][size= 7][/ size]TEST[color =darkblue][/ color][size= 7][/ size]
Lol. I tried putting it before, after, and both

So your post starts and stop the color and the font size change without having the words between start and stopping the color and font size changes. (again spaces put in intentionally so it wouldn't do it and you could see the syntax)

Quote any of the messages that have the font changed and you can see it like the computer sees it.

You can also edit peoples posts that you are quoting (although dogs in heat are looking to get nailed rather than do the nailing).

[quote=MidnightToker( • )( • )What?[/quote]

MidnightToker( • )( • ) wrote:

I changed the color and font and it didn't change. What's the secret?

Huh?

Just paint over the text to change the color or whatever with the pull down menu to change it to different colors, size and stuff. You don't have to type in the syntax stuff, and stuff

A man wakes up in the hospital, bandaged from head to foot.

The doctor comes in and says, "Ah, I see you've regained consciousness.
Now, you probably won't remember, but you were in a pile-up on the
freeway. You're going to be okay, you'll walk again and everything,
but...

"Something happened. I'm trying to break this gently, but the fact is,
your willy was chopped off in the wreck and we were unable to find it."

The man groans, but the doctor goes on, "You've got $9000 in insurance
compensation coming and we have the technology now to build you a new
willy that will work as well as your old one did - better in fact! But the
thing is, it doesn't come cheap. It's $1000 an inch."

The man perks up at this.

"So," the doctor says, "It's for you to decide how many inches you want.
But it's something you'd better discuss with your wife. I mean, if you
had a five inch one before, and you decide to go for a nine incher, she
might be a bit put out. But if you had a nine inch one before, and you decide
only to invest in a five incher this time, she might be disappointed. So it's
important that she plays a role in helping you make the decision."

The man agrees to talk with his wife.

The doctor comes back the next day. "So," says the doctor, "have you
spoken with your wife?"

"I have," says the man.

"And what is the decision?" asks the doctor.

"We're getting granite countertops."

"Meow" in cat means Woof! in dog.

Read this one today:

My wife walked in the house, slammed her shit down and started ranting about everything imaginable.

Our nine year old daughter walks in and said, "Who lit the fuse on your Tampon?"

I had to step outside so I didn't get slapped for laughing...

Dave Chappelle meeting Jim Carrey.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=kxUDd6rOS38

Do watch to the end.

What is brown, and rhymes with Snoop?





























Dr. Dre.

Woman:

"They are beautiful flowers, but now I'll be expected to spend the weekend on back with my legs in the air."




Flower Delivery Guy:

"Don't you have a vase?"


Visual:

https://www.fnforum.net/cdn-cgi/image/format=auto,onerror=redirect,width=1920,height=1920,fit=scale-down/https://www.fnforum.net/attachments/img_2047-jpeg.186965/

As a cougar hunter once said:

Cougar Hunter: "She's great"

Me: "Good looking?"

Cougar Hunter: "No, but she has a big purse."

^good one

I miss him.

Everyone wants James Earl Jones or Morgan Freeman to narrate their lifestory. I always favored Gilbert or Bobcat Goldthwait. Just to laugh at the reaction of the room.

In my house I'm treated like a god. Totally ignored until someone needs something.

Since it's Easter:

Man 1: "OH my lord! Look! It's Jesus!

Man 2: "No way"

Man 1: "Yahweh"

Bought my pet rabbit a treadmill.

It's a little fit bunny.


Why do you never see elephants hiding in trees?

Because they're so good at it.


How do you catch a unique bird?

Unique up on it.